In more than two decades of marriage, I’ve done my share of offensive, stupid, rude, and sinful things that have negatively affected my wife. I’m not proud of them. Looking back, I can see some things that I learned about how to recover from these blunders which might be helpful if you ever offend your spouse in small or large ways.
You need to know how to apologize to your wife. Here are 3 ways to recover after you’ve blown it with your wife.
How to apologize to your wife
1. Be Quick
If the offense is small, you can normally apologize quickly and it’s over in minutes. For larger offenses, apologies might need to be reinforced over time and met with obvious corrective action. Sometimes, “I’m sorry” isn’t quite enough and needs to be backed up by new behavior.
2. Don’t Demand Forgiveness
Forgiveness must be willfully extended from the offended, not begrudgingly granted because the offender insists. Trying, “The Bible commands you to forgive me!” approach is not recommended (or humble, or gracious, or aligned with lots of other Scripture). Back-off.
3. Pray a Lot
Only the Lord can really lead us to forgiveness, restoration, and peace. If you’ve hurt your spouse, especially if the hurt was significant, you’ll need God to work on his or her heart (and yours) to fully mend things. Pray hard, pray often.
Ask your spouse if you offended them recently. If they admit you did, first, thank them for being willing to tell you. Then, ask them how you can make it right. Listen well, be humble and patient.
Consider this Bible Verse: Romans 12:18 – “If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”